Good evening
new and loyal followers welcome to my eighth Wednesday blog of Mz M@nni in the
Morning. For those of you reading this in England you will be all too aware
that actually today is Friday and it’s evidently NOT morning hahaha!! Well, my
sincerest apologies to anyone who actually eagerly awaits my weekly rants. Unfortunately
the torrential weather on Wednesday not only took out my internet connection but
also caused me to lose all 3,478 words
that I had put my heart and soul into… L
*devastated is an understatement although for you guys reading it probably a
blessing in disguise lol. However, as
my beautiful and emotionally intelligent princess decided to tell me yesterday
having ran frantically into my room (after hearing me scream out once realising
that my WHOLE blog had disappeared.)
‘It’s ok mummy, it’s only your words that have
gone, not your talent…there’s no point in getting upset, just write another
blog and ask God to bless you with more words….I bet it will be even better
than the last one!!….remember what you ALWAYS tell me… everything happens for a
reason’
Wow!! Well
that was me being told (oddly enough by myself) lol. Whilst feeling very proud
and overwhelmed all at the same time I took her/my advice and sucked it all up
and started again from scratch just like she said. My Princess was right on the
money, it is so easy to focus on what’s gone wrong sometimes instead of putting
effort into what can be done to fix it….so todays blog is 100% dedicated to my
unbelievably intelligent, empathetic and insightful daughter THAIYANA
SEMPA-DAWKINS whom I love and admire with all my heart and mark my words WILL change
the world some day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well
here goes nothing, recently I have been talking to a lot of my female friends
who are pushing thirty or have rolled over to nearly 40 and the topic of ‘where
have all the good men gone?’ kept coming up in conversation. Now
before all the good men start piping up, switching off or reaching for the
little x in the top right hand corner, you might want to finish reading my
thoughts first, as this is far from a male bashing blog you may assume it to
be. In fact it’s completely the opposite. Well I’m clearly no expert in this
field but it is something that I have been deliberating over for the past
couple weeks now, so here’s what I think………..
For all the
so called ‘good’ men and ‘good’ women out there who are incidentally single in
this current climate, it’s understandable that after a while of trying to meet
the right ones but ending up with the wrong ones, one starts to lose faith in
whether or not ‘The One’ actually exists???? Am I right? Then after dating
enough wrong ones both sexes are convinced that the universe is conspiring
against them and that actually maybe they’re not having any luck because they
are looking for something/someone that doesn’t exist. Thus ‘Good’ guys decide that
ALL girls just want a bad boy and pretty much give up on being nice and become
cynical towards love and ‘Good’ girls decide that after meeting one too many ‘Bad’
Boys ALL men are the same and they both end up jaded and stop looking for LOVE.
Seriously I am forever hearing why are all guys’ jerks? And why can’t I just
meet a decent man? When the reality is they probably already have, many times
but they haven’t chosen to recognize them.(TO BUSY NOTICING WHATS WRONG INSTEAD OF ACKNOWLEDGING WHATS RIGHT) You see few people ever stop to
address the ‘Real’ problem. They’re looking for the right answers but asking
all the wrong questions? There comes a point you have to stop asking what’s
wrong with the world and everyone in it and start asking what’s wrong with
you? Ask yourself why YOU find yourself
attracted to Jerks and why YOU accept how they treat you? And the same goes for
you men why do you choose to fall in love with women that are unavailable? The phrase
it’s NOT them it’s YOU seems applicable here. Change starts within and it
always starts with us. If you want a better relationship or just a relationship
full stop, then fix the one you have with yourself first. We spend so much time
looking at the problem that that all five, ten, fifteen relationships later we
still haven't found the solution. Then we start looking to external forces for
answers to internal conflicts and wonder why things aren't working. In the search
for the ideal Soul mate we get so preoccupied with what we want from a
relationship that most of us forget to check what we are ‘bringing’ to the
relationship. If we scrutinized our check list for ourselves even half as much
as we do for potential partners I’m pretty sure we'd find even we don't level
up. My advice, from first-hand experience is to start becoming the kind of
person you would want to be with and then maybe when you reach that goal Mr or
Mrs Right will turn up on time, when you least expect it, just like in the
movies lol. Ok ok I know that was a little too corny even for me but I can't
help it I do believe we find what we are looking for. Hence I always look for
the beauty in the world and the good in people. Mainly because the prospect of
what my life would be like if I didn't doesn't even bare thinking about :-(
Our
mind sets need resetting and the scary thing is most people don’t even know it.
Twenty, thirty, forty years of conditioning to think negatively can all be changed
with 1 decision to make the right choice? Don’t get me wrong if your life is
bliss and you’re truly happy with it, then fine keep doing what you’re doing because
obviously you must be doing something right….but if you’re honest with yourself
and you find that for one reason or another it’s not and it hasn’t been for a
while, then something needs to change. I told you in a past blog that the
definition of insanity was repeating the same behaviour and expecting a
different result and trust me they are words to live by….if you change your
thinking you’ll change your world. Look up the biographies of those whom you admire
and what they did to get to where they are and guaranteed the one thing they
ALL have in common is what I call the ‘Mind Set’ of a winner.
So in conclusion to the question where have all the good men gone??? They haven’t gone anywhere, they’re exactly where they’ve always been…right in front of you, you just have to dig a little deeper to find some of them!! As with most gold it’s usually buried and hard to find but isn’t that what makes it so much more valuable when you do? In order to attract a decent stand-up guy/girl you first have to be a decent evolved man/woman who deserves one. (and speaking as someone who is currently still very much single I have to assume that God has not finished with me yet and that I am clearly still a work in progress lol ;-) but you know what I’m cool with that because although
So in conclusion to the question where have all the good men gone??? They haven’t gone anywhere, they’re exactly where they’ve always been…right in front of you, you just have to dig a little deeper to find some of them!! As with most gold it’s usually buried and hard to find but isn’t that what makes it so much more valuable when you do? In order to attract a decent stand-up guy/girl you first have to be a decent evolved man/woman who deserves one. (and speaking as someone who is currently still very much single I have to assume that God has not finished with me yet and that I am clearly still a work in progress lol ;-) but you know what I’m cool with that because although
"I may not be where I need to be, THANK GOD I
am not where I used to be (Joyce Meyer)
Look
at a man for who he ‘could become’ instead of the man ‘he is’ and everything
might start to look a little different. Try loving him unconditionally just as
you would your child and see what happens. For those of us with children you’ll
know first-hand that it’s so easy to see the greatness in them? We see the
better version of them even when they’re not behaving that way and we nurture
it. Can you imagine what would happen if we applied that concept to our other
halves. ‘See a man as he should be, and
that shall he become.’ On that note peeps remember that the conflicts and drama
we face externally is just a mirror to the conflicts we are facing internally
and as easy as it is to want to blame everyone else for our situations the
truth is it’s on US. What you think about you bring about. Choose to think on
happiness, love and hope instead of fear anger and doubt and watch how the laws
of attraction get to work.
"If
what you think about you bring about and the law of attraction is true and your
reflection of life is Sh!t then the problem is YOU!!" (NIA-JAI)
It’s
not that Life isn’t good or that good men and women don’t exist, it’s just that
we stopped LOOKING for it.
Change
your mind and you'll change what you find I promise!!
Till
next Wednesday or Friday lol
#ALWAYSLOVE
<3
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